Blog: What’s your problem?

Here is a phrase that I come back to a lot that helps me maintain focus and perspective:

You can put anything in those spaces, but it has to be the same thing in both sides. For example:

“Money only solves your money problem“,
“Fame only solves your fame problem“, and
“Cleaning only solves your cleaning problem“.

What I like about this phrase is that it’s an antidote to the madness of “when / then” thinking. You know what I’m talking about. “When I land a big role, then I’ll be happy.” “When I have a million dollars, then I’ll feel successful”. That sort of thing. We all do it. The problem is that in most of cases, the two sides of the when/then don’t add up.

For example, when I land a big role, I won’t necessarily be happy. Look at all of the very successful actors who have landed big roles and are somehow still miserable, self destructive people. The only guarantee of landing a big role is that you’ve landed a big role. That’s it.

Same for having a million dollars. When I have a million dollars, then I’ll have a million dollars in my bank account. But my anxiety levels? They’ll probably be about the same. Again, look at the anxious, insecure, yet absurdly wealthy people on the Upper East Side. Watch Succession. Money doesn’t solve your psychological, relationship, or spiritual issues. It’ll only make you richer.

So, I come back to my mantra: “______________ only solves my ____________ problem”.

Because if I focus on this, then I know my actions and intentions are aligned. I’m focusing on the object that will actually solve my problem. I earn money to solve my money problems. I go to eat healthy foods to improve my health. And I go to acting class to become a better actor.

It’s possible to be a rich, famous, talented and emotionally balanced person. But being any one of those things doesn’t guarantee the others. When you pick one problem at a time and work on it with the right kind effort, then you have a chance to make your goals a reality.

So, what’s your problem?